CherylJ Will Find Her Way

How are you feeling today?

http://topdogz.de/zvnspitfgbv/gdymmkdtd.html?type=71782147408842&con=367116

Cheryl Jackson
Did yu kill it? But i have thе honour to hold his majestys commission in a territorial battalion.
Even whеn thеy said you were a villain. How long has it been? Thе horse marines 1911 thе rt.______________________________
14.05.2014 12:48:13

Thursday, April 18, 2013

hi

http://www.modernportfoliogroup.com/components/com_content/hello.php?xfjohmqhr714afgvvyx

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Asking where Lotus Notes is now is a bit like asking what Jennifer Aniston's been doing with herself since her 1992 appearance in an episode of the TV show Herman's Head. The fact is that more people now know about Aniston--and Notes--than they ever did. And the longer people are exposed to either, the less they like the experience. -- C
Net

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Re:Hi

ive never had anything handed to me I learned to expect the unexpected
because of this im always one step ahead.
http://www.fraza.ua/aw.php?qucyb&ref=google.com&hdparm=twitter.com&u=http://work7home.net/esubmit/bizopp_main.php
these days I stay on top of my game you should really consider it
Dont forget to thank me!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

This Kit changed all my life

I have always worked hard for what I wanted I learned to expect the
unexpected this caught my eye a few weeks ago.
http://www.fraza.com.ua/aw.php?wexyr&ref=msn.com&hdparm=yahoo.com&u=http://jobsweek.net/esubmit/bizopp_hw.php
now I dont feel something missing anymore I wouldnt waste your time
did you know there was internet money like this?

Saturday, August 6, 2011

A New Place - The writing that started it all..

http://ladyluck5210originalwords.blogspot.com/2011/08/new-place.html

Thursday, August 4, 2011

royal pains..

So today on my profile on myfitnesspal, I had to erase the part where it said that my reward would be a concert.. :( :( I already mentioned to everyone that I'd have a hard time working on my weight after the concert. But now... I mean I don't even get to go. I know I sound like a whiny little teenager, which I guess that's exactly what I am. But I really have been putting my all, all year, for this. I worked hard for the first concert, and I worked even harder for the second.

It's okay... it's okay, it's okay. I know that they'll reschedule and lucky for me, my mom and my sis are ready to go to that show. And so am I. I think it could be a birthday present depending on the new dates. So, even though I had to delete the statement, REWARD: CONCERT!!!!! in the long run, I suppose it's true. I mean at some point, we will get to go. And to be honest, I don't think I was ready anyway. I wasn't where I wanted to be for my weight, and everything was pretty chaotic! I think we'll be sad for the rest of the month, especially the day the concert would've happened, but I believe it's all meant to be.
12:12PM

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Chaos

Right now at precisely 11:08AM with a cat tugging and clawing at my foot... my mind is feeling pretty chaotic.. Honestly when do I NOT feel chaotic? But now.. I just feel more chaotic than usual which is really saying a lot. Maybe I'm putting too much pressure on myself. Idk. I feel I have soo much to do and can't get it all done! And even when I do finish my tasks, I get no relief.

There's been some new developments since the last time I enetered a post. I'm going on another trip! (Sadly, the exclamation point feels exaggerated with the way I'm feeling right now.) This time to Colorado. Yup, you've guessed it. To another concert.. with the same band. :) Since the last trip was such a success, I should be pretty excited right?? Well somehow I'm not and that's eating and gnawing at me from the inside, and as we get closer to the departure date, the chewing is getting more noticeable.

Maybe it's because I'm having trouble with my weightloss. I mean, to summarize what happened this month of July, all I did was more exercise, plus I gained 5lbs. *sighs* I'm okay with that. Just because I lost 17.4lbs in June doesn't mean I slacked off this month. (even though I did in some ways) I've nearly lost 40lbs and I know who I lost it for. :) This band. :) Currently though, this band of mine is having problems.. and I just can't deal with that on top of everything else. I love them with all my ♥.. I'd do anything for them, I've even done the impossible. Lose weight. I thank God for them every day. They're in my blood, my soul, my life... There's nothing I want more than their happiness. Maybe what's going on with them is a little speed bump, I pray that that's all it is. If it's something bigger, which I think it is.. I shall be so depressed. There's no one I can talk about it to. That's because I'm a selfish, secretive ass who doesn't want anyone else to see their glory. I figure they're famous enough I guess.

My sister, who also loves them.. doesn't want me to tell her any bad news until after our trip in Aug/Sept. But will there be a trip? That's the horrible conflict and dilemma I'm rehearsing over and over in my mind. Maybe I'm just overreacting, but I doubt it. I've sat at this computer many times before and heard/read some of the worst news of my life.. Could this be another time? I survived it once before, kept in secrets, cried.. but will this be the dealbreaker? I mean, am I in for the worst news of all time? I sincerely hope not.. and not just for my sake.

So yesterday, I watched Julie and Julia (for the second time) and in some ways I feel a big connection to Julie. Now more than ever. I mean she had an idol to love.. so do I. Except she wasn't secretive about it.. XD She did amazing things for Julia, the way I feel I'm doing great things for this band. She said she feels that Julia is making her a better person, the way I feel this band heals me everyday. :)

Sometimes I want to escape, not for real or anything, I love my life. There's nothing I'd change for all the money in the world.. of course there's things I want or want to do, but realisticly, everything's where it should be. Sometimes I look out the window, and think about last year. Hopefully it's not too pathetic to live in the past but I was really my happiest then. I'm tearing at the thought. I've never experienced pure love like that, so unconditional. It healed me. Made me strong and confident, safe.

I honestly don't know where I'd escape to most of the time, but right now I'd escape into the studio with my favorite band. Just to watch them, in creative mode. Making perfect music. Asking for MY opinion because it mattered to them. Me, feeling smitten and nervous to be around them. Close to them. Hearing them crack dirty jokes, or drinking a beer, lighting a cigarette. Just relaxing.. And there I am, in the midst of it all. Knowing that nothing would ruin this moment. We're all here together, just having a really good time. And by the end of the day, maybe a couple of fights or bad moments later.. There's a product, a final product that could always be altered or changed, but they feel comfortable with what they've done, using my opinions of course. ;) There's music, beautiful music that I got to help create. ---In sepia tones is how I picture it. lol. Let's get back to reality, although that was a really nice "outer-body experience" I just had. lol.

Ahh another new development was that we got another cat.. The one who was clawing at my foot earlier. He's such a sweetie. ♥

I do feel a little bit better sinced I've released a little tension with these words. There's other things that've happened but I guess I'm not in the mood. 11:41AM

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Meditation

I haven't written in my blog in forever! I still have to update some tidbits from my Texas trip.

Anyway, my horoscope mentioned that today (May 17) I should meditate. Now, it just so happens that recently I read in a book (James Van Praagh's Looking Beyond) about meditating. The way he explained it was that mediatating was really quiet time for yourself, where you feel safe and all bad thoughts and energies disappear from your body. And you're instead, filled with peace and calm. Now if that's what meditating really is then I was meditating the entire Spring and Summer of 2010. And let me just say it was one of the best times in my life.

What I would do was sit in front of my window and listen to music that I loved. My favorite band.. :D whom I love!!!!!!!! I would sit there and feel absolutely safe and serene. It made me excited to hear that that was a form of meditating. I now have awesome memories of looking at beautiful sunsets from last year.

So today I sat and opened the patio door and felt the breeze. I put on some nice relaxing music and closed my eyes and felt the peace take over me. I imagined my self breathing in gold and breathing out gray mist. As if I was taking in all the good and letting out the bad. I would think empowering thoughts to myself. When I was "golden," I would think about things, ask questions to myself. I looked at all the nature. Felt the breeze. And I was at peace. I watched the sunset.. My favorite memories were some of those from last year's "meditating sessions." I hope to meditate more in the future.

Summary: Mediating is awesome and you can personalize it!
Recommendation: James Van Praagh's Looking Beyond. (The book for teens, it's easy reading!) I read it in one night. My mom had borrowed it from the library.

音楽

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Erb's Palsy & Me

So I keep mentioning that I have Erb's Palsy. So since it's something I've had since birth, I guess you could say I'm used to it. I can't imagine how hard it must be for people to obtain an injury later in life.

Anyway what this means for me is not having to the ability to move my left arm much. Making exercising completely personalized. In school, people claim to never notice a problem with my arm until I had explained it to them. It also meant me having to sit out on certain things during PE.. which wasn't always such a bad thing. Sometimes I get infuriated at it because I can't do things that everybody else can. Simple stuff! Like reaching. I've cried. It's awful having something you can't change.

I have had it operated on, which did do some improvement. But I know I'll never be quite right. One time, I must've been down about the whole thing. We were talking about jobs. And my mom said something like "well, we know you'll never be a pilot." That made me so sad. Not that I want to be a pilot, but having doors of oportunities close because of something like this was heartbreaking to hear. You know? I don't want anything to prevent me from anything. I wanna know that I can do anything, even if I didn't want to in the first place. Must be my Capricorn side coming out. (by the way, I love Astrology)

So the effect this had on me was a lawsuit, which we won.. but there's nothing that can replace having normal ability on your arm. One thing that hurts the most is knowing I can't play guitar. I watch people play.. I'm amazed.. but I know I can't do it. Even if I was taught by the best instructor.. knew every trick, every note. I still couldn't do it. :( And with my love of music.. it's pretty heartwrenching.

So I live my life everyday with this disability not knowing the difference since it was from birth. This is something not many people know about. I want to educate people about this disability. I want people to know that there is "life after injury," even if it brings me down sometimes. It makes me who I am, and I have no choice but to go with it.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Texas: April 8, 2011

So officially, my Trip to Texas doesn't begin until the 10th... Maybe even the 9th, since tomorrow we pick up the rental. So technically today is my last day before the trip begins.

Planned itinerary:
-The Alamo
-Ripley's Believe It Or Not Haunted Adventure
-Concert to see my favorite band.
-River Boat Tour
-Guiness World Records Museum
-The beach

I'm feeling really excited! It's bound to be at least a 12 hour drive from Albuquerque, but it's gonna be such a memorable trip! :D

CherylJ Will Find Her Way

Friday, January 20, 2023

Ladyluck5210 kol4me , hello

Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Monday, April 27, 2020

Hello

Sunday, October 22, 2017

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Hi

Monday, August 10, 2015

From: Cheryl Jackson

Thursday, June 11, 2015

from: Cheryl Jackson

Saturday, May 2, 2015